June 10, 2024

How To Be A Mentor-Part 2

Show Notes
Transcript

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Hi! Welcome to the Poultry Keepers Podcast.

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I'm Rip Stalvey, and together with Mandelyn Royal and John Gunterman, we're your co hosts for this show, and it's our mission to help you have a happy, healthy, and productive flock.

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He was probably at that point, he was about the only surviving old time red breeders, and he'd been breeding them for a number of years, but to have him tell me, I don't want to beat you again, that touched me, that inspired me.

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And

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that level.

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Of trust and at the next show when you're both there, it's just gonna inspire you both to try even harder now.

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Yes.

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Yeah.

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And you're both gonna improve because now you're each other.

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And that's what I like about

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gonna the poultry shows.

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Even if I don't take any birds.

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That level of camaraderie and the socializing and the educational aspects of it, but also the good natured ribbing of peer against peer and the grief they give each other and the humor of it all one of the best parts about it is going out to dinner with you weirdo red people.

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It's a great crowd.

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It's not the bird for me, but it's definitely the people for me.

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Yes,

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That's the same way with me.

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I was more into the people than I was into the showing.

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And then if you get a ribbon, cool.

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Yeah, that's the gravy.

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As a mentor, Please remember, you're not going to be the know all, end all.

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You're not going to have the answers to everybody's questions, but chances are you probably know someone else who could help them.

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So don't be afraid to refer them.

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That's, that to me is a really great indication of a really great mentor.

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If they'll tell you who they know that can help you.

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And that comes from knowing what your own strengths and weaknesses are too.

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Absolutely.

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Absolutely.

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I think it does take a little bit of self awareness to know when you're being helpful and when they need to perhaps talk to someone with more experience than what you have.

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And you can't let ego get in the way.

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Oh, no, you can't.

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If you're at least a little bit egotistical, you're not going to do that.

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And you don't want that.

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As a mentee, I wouldn't want that.

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Those are the people that don't share their secrets.

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Exactly right.

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Exactly right.

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Oh, I still haven't found a a perfect bird.

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And I am my own worst critic.

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I, you hand me one of the best looking birds and I'm going, eh, this and this.

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Oh, I think

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I'm going to eat it.

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No, nothing's ever, yeah, stew pot.

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I am my own worst critic.

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Yes.

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About my birds.

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And that's what enables the constant improvement.

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I went a number of years very frustrated, and then one of my mentors sat me down and said, Do you even realize what you've done?

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What do you mean?

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These birds are garbage.

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And he said, No.

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You put meat on a bird that is a breed that no one ever did that with them.

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You have a feather problem.

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The carcass is okay.

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The carcass is better than anyone's.

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Color is easier to fix.

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Yep.

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Oh.

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But they still suck.

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Laughter

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Yeah.

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I've bred myself into a corner I couldn't come back out of a few times.

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I think everybody should do that at least once so that you know what the corner feels like and you stay out of it.

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And you can feel yourself heading that direction and maybe save yourself before you get there next time.

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I

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learned the most and I learned the fastest when I make mistakes.

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And if you try to go into the hobby and never make a mistake, you're going to limit your own learning right there.

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I can't remember the exact quote.

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We'll have to look this up.

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But the hardest lessons learned or the best remembered or something along that line?

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I don't

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know,

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but you get the sentiment.

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It's true.

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Yeah.

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It's true.

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Mandelyn, if I'm wanting to be a mentor, you got any tips for me?

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Don't go in and try to change their program immediately.

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Just feel out the situation, where they're at, where their mind is at, what their goals are, and just try to take that step.

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Initial slow and steady approach to guide them into the process.

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I agree.

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I think as a mentor, we need to ask, we need to get in the habit of asking a lot of questions.

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Sometimes you may ask them a question that causes the light bulb to go on in their brain.

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I love the faces they make when that happens.

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Oh wow.

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I never thought that could be a problem or I never thought that could be a positive.

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Ask a lot of questions.

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What

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I love is

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the 3:00 AM emails when they wake up and they're like, ah, I just thought of, and they're like, ha, you got it,

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Okay, let's see.

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Yeah, the distract about.

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I think it's important too, when I'm working with somebody, I wanna know what makes'em tick.

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You have to I mean are they more into production qualities?

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Are they into exhibition qualities?

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They, I need to understand them and the better I understand them, the more help and the more accurate the help I give them will be.

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I think it's important that you let them kinda lead the process.

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You're there to facilitate and you may see something that needs addressing right now in your opinion, but they're not ready to deal with that for whatever reason.

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And that reason may not even be apparent to

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you.

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So it's okay.

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You know what, they're not ready to fix that now.

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Great.

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Let's move on to what they are ready to fix.

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You can't work with somebody.

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And then the next person that comes along that you offer help to, don't expect them to be like the person you other, you previously worked with.

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No, the new person doesn't have the same experiences.

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They're not starting from the same point that your previous mentee was.

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Yeah.

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Each and every one is gonna be in a completely different place than, it's all very individualized, really.

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And you want to definitely avoid creating a situation where they feel overwhelmed and it shouldn't come off as daunting.

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Exactly.

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And you, I think I wanna avoid, all the people that I help, having a cookie cutter approach and, their farms have my feel to it.

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I don't think that's appropriate.

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It should have their feel to it.

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Doesn't work.

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And it's not going to.

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It's just going to make it harder for them to try and, we learned something in the Navy there's many ways to do it and I'm going to show you a way.

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It's not the way, it's a way to accomplish the task.

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I'm sure there's a standard operating procedures, manual somewhere that says this is the way.

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in doctrine, but everybody's going to perform that differently.

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Yes.

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I think by asking a lot of questions up front and really not just up front, but throughout the process, is that it helps me to understand how I can best support them.

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The more I know about that person's background and what they're going through and what they have gone through and where they want to go, that's going to really drive how I help them and the subjects I share with that person about.

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Timing has to be perfect.

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Yeah, when you share certain

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pieces too.

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Overwhelming somebody with some advanced knowledge before they're ready could be dangerous, because if they don't fully understand it, they could try and implement it incorrectly.

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It's like that, all things in good time, yeah it's managing.

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John, how do you feel about, let me see if I can put this in as a good question format.

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Should I tell folks just the big picture things, or should I include all of them?

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The small things as well.

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To me it's all, everything is in the detail in the military.

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How many times we've said attention to detail.

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It's all, the devil is in the details and it's in the details of our birds as well.

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Having a good.

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Big picture is super important.

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So you know where you're going and having a map to get there, but the detail is in the route that you take.

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You

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know, one thing that I learned a long time ago was the people that did well at shows, the people that did well breeding their birds were the peoples that had.

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The ability to really focus on as many details as they possibly could.

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Especially simultaneously.

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That gets difficult for me.

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Yes.

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I think it's difficult for all of us.

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The more details you pay attention to, the better your birds are going to be and the better your birds are going to perform and the more shows they're going to win.

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Now that I got my crooked center toe under control, I just got to watch for it.

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And I can start worrying about another detail.

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I was not prepared for how many different little details there are and you almost have to mentally disassemble the bird to start really seeing all of it.

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And that's the first section of the standard of perfection.

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Wasn't it?

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Goes into all the details.

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Mandelyn, don't you think that's pretty true of just about all newcomers coming into poultry?

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Yes.

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They're not prepared for the little details.

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Correct.

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Any fancy that involves conformation or conformation, dogs, horses, cattle, cats, chickens, it's all the same.

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I think every hobby, really, because even when I'm sewing a costume, just the tiny little details of how I fold a corner.

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Will affect the entire lay of a garment.

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And

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it's just like the birds, how that leg is positioned, where it's positioned on the body, does it have full support of its toes?

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Is that back toe curved around a little bit duck footed?

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Like I only recently learned about.

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That duck toe thing in the last couple of years and there's even more details beyond that.

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And that's where I'm trying to be real careful when I'm mentoring people is to not bring all of that to light initially and make it sound daunting because it's really not that bad.

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You just have to roll with it and Figure out what's the biggest, most glaring thing you can fix this season.

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Just pick one.

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Yes, exactly.

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Something I've said it earlier, but I'm going to say it again.

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You need to be able to tell them what they need to hear, not just what they want to hear.

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Yeah.

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mentee kind of relationship.

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It's like friendship while being way too nice.

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I think.

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Every time I have someone who approaches me about mentoring them, the question that I have for me as a mentor is, what do I have to offer them?

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If they approach me with a particular problem, will I be able to answer it?

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If we're not honest about our own knowledge, we can't really help someone to their fullest, that, what they need.

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We just can't do it.

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And probably the worst thing you could do is give them an answer that pacifies them but doesn't ever actually reach to any resolution.

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And that's where it's really important to know who your resources are, to know who might be better for that question, to actually try to get them a real, genuine answer, and not just wrap it up and kick them on their way.

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Now, you said a mouthful there

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Yeah, I'm just going to let that sink in for a second.

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I think it's important.

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We call that pause for dramatic

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effect.

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I think it's really important that we establish expectations with our mentees and I think it was really important.

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It was important for me that I had some expectations as a mentee when I was working with Mr.

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Reese, and we talked about those on a regular basis.

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It was just not a single conversation.

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What was I looking to learn?

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What did I need help with?

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What did my birds lack?

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How can I correct that?

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Once you know those expectations, the mentor and the mentee can have a dynamite relationship.

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And often I find it very helpful to let the mentee lead the way.

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I don't know everything they don't know.

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I don't know everything they need help with, even if they don't think they need help with it.

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Establishing expectations, asking questions over and over.

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That will tell you a lot.

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That will reveal.

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So very much.

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It's a constant feedback loop and that's how it should be.

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That's how it works.

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Yeah, definitely.

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And I think as a.

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Mentor, we need to have a genuine interest in our mentee and what they're going to do and what they are doing.

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If we don't, I don't, I'll be honest with you.

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I don't see how somebody can help you if they're not genuinely interested in you, what you know, and what you want.

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I'm just a consultant then, and I can give you my EIN number and you can have your accountant write me a check and we could do it that way too.

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But that's, I don't think that benefits anybody.

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Maybe for some pretty straightforward, factual things, but those little details and the nuance, because especially when you start, because a chicken is a chicken.

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Yeah.

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But once you get into the different breeds, then what works in one breed might not work in another breed.

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And there's a lot of I don't know that I would call it hidden knowledge, but it's wrapped up into the brains of the people who participate in that breed.

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There's not very many books, and sometimes it'll even go into a particular bloodline and how that bloodline passes forward certain traits.

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And you're only going to find that stuff out from the people working with those lines.

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That's right.

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And being able to refer them to those people.

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And then having enough time.

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And then hopefully those

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people have time to reciprocate the request for information.

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Crazy.

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Yeah.

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If all you're looking for is a boilerplate on, overall, how do I raise a healthy chicken, that, that information's out there.

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If you want to get, specific about it, how do I raise the best birds of this breed and this line in my environment?

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That's a different ballgame.

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And that's going to take that specialized local knowledge that's only going to come from decades of practical experience.

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I think the last thing I have to share with folks about becoming a mentor is to get excited for the people you're working with.

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When they achieve a certain level of competency, when they reach a goal, get excited for them.

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Oh, it's hard not to.

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And be genuine about it.

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Oh, and they fledge out of the nest.

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Yeah,

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that's what inspires me.

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That's why I do it.

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Yeah, absolutely.

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Absolutely.

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When I see them

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turn around and start teaching within their own right, that's where I'm like, yes, there's another one to help spread the word.

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When I hear, and I don't want to hear the exact same words that I told them come back out of their mouth, but when I hear them explain to somebody else a topic that I had to explain to them, to me, that's so gratifying because to me, that signifies that they've really learned it and they're confident and comfortable with it.

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Teaching that to somebody else.

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And to me, that's a level of knowledge that you're not going to get from just by reading a book and regurgitating information.

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Exactly right.

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Guys, before we close out our recording session here, y'all have any famous last words you want to leave?

00:16:42.179 --> 00:16:44.960
With folks who are considering being a mentor.

00:16:45.759 --> 00:17:04.529
My NPIP guy a couple years ago, he brought up that he would like to see more localized mentor based sort of poultry clubs to where people can get together, monthly or so and have a little hangout session to talk about their flocks and to help each other and guide each other.

00:17:04.529 --> 00:17:09.400
And he gave me the list of everyone else that he tests for within our township.

00:17:09.724 --> 00:17:46.964
And said, you should just have the Goshen Chicken Club, and it never got traction, mostly because none of us stepped up to do it, but it's a great idea that I keep in my mind maybe I should, because then, with that sort of local involvement, You're almost creating the flocks that are the best for your area, and one person can focus on eggs, someone else can focus on meat, or dual purpose, or broodiness, and by having that diversity of the flocks all locally available, then you can steer people towards the flock that suits their goals.

00:17:47.555 --> 00:17:49.125
And support each other that way.

00:17:49.924 --> 00:17:56.934
And in a, in an environment like yours where you have so many people, networking is going to become more and more important.

00:17:57.484 --> 00:18:05.214
If somebody comes to me with a wellsummer question, I don't know, but I know my neighbor about two miles that way has gorgeous wellsummers.

00:18:05.565 --> 00:18:08.914
If I were to want to get into some, I would get his birds.

00:18:09.474 --> 00:18:15.595
There's certain things that regardless of the breed, just keeping in a certain area, we're going to have unique challenges.

00:18:15.595 --> 00:18:17.964
We have an incredible ermine pressure here.

00:18:18.285 --> 00:18:24.765
Those little weasels are vicious and, networking with local people, say, when is the peak predation for ermine?

00:18:24.775 --> 00:18:32.694
What trapping, what, what works to keep our chickens alive during that first heavy thaw in the spring when they're out looking to feed their young.

00:18:33.494 --> 00:18:41.484
But just having access to that local knowledge is, was so critical to keeping my flock alive through March and the beginning of April.

00:18:42.285 --> 00:18:42.704
Yeah, definitely.

00:18:43.325 --> 00:18:43.775
Yeah.

00:18:44.575 --> 00:18:57.315
I've got one, one thing to add and then we'll close, but I found this quote and it really spoke to me and it's by Simon Sinek, S I N E K.

00:18:57.809 --> 00:18:58.170
Yes, sir.

00:18:58.710 --> 00:19:05.059
A mentor is not someone who walks ahead of us and tells us how they did it.

00:19:05.859 --> 00:19:11.500
A mentor is someone who walks beside us and guides us on what we can do.

00:19:12.299 --> 00:19:13.009
Oh, that's deep.

00:19:13.410 --> 00:19:13.779
Yeah.

00:19:14.420 --> 00:19:18.109
If you're thinking about mentoring somebody, get your walking shoes on.

00:19:18.910 --> 00:19:20.269
Yeah, it's a trip.

00:19:21.069 --> 00:19:21.529
It is.

00:19:22.170 --> 00:19:24.220
Folks, we appreciate you joining us today.

00:19:24.759 --> 00:19:27.970
We're happy we could talk about becoming a mentor.

00:19:27.990 --> 00:19:30.170
Hopefully we've encouraged some of you to do that.

00:19:30.640 --> 00:19:38.769
If not maybe a little bit later on when you become a little more knowledgeable you'll take on the rewarding task of mentoring somebody or the rewarding

00:19:38.819 --> 00:19:40.420
task of becoming a mentee.

00:19:40.940 --> 00:19:42.069
Yes, absolutely.

00:19:42.279 --> 00:19:46.210
We need more, both mentors and mentees until next time.

00:19:47.009 --> 00:19:51.680
We hope you have a great time and we'll be back next Tuesday.

00:19:51.869 --> 00:19:55.099
This brings us to the close of another Poultry Keepers podcast.

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We're very happy you chose to join us.

00:19:57.130 --> 00:20:01.859
Until next time, we'd appreciate it if you would drop us a note, letting us know your thoughts about our podcast.

00:20:01.900 --> 00:20:04.710
Please share our podcast with your friends that keep poultry.

00:20:04.759 --> 00:20:08.730
We hope you'll join us again when we'll be talking poultry from feathers to function.